Once upon a time there was a house fan that lived in a bedroom beside a second hand chest of drawers that had seen better days but was still of superior lineage to the vast majority of modern furniture.   The fan was proud of its duty as it was often called upon to blow air around and provide circulation for two humans, a canine, and a feline.

It had come to its current station via the living room in the home it was in, and at first thought the move might have been a demotion due to dereliction of duty. It soon realized, however, that the move was not a backward one at all. Indeed, it was the full realization of the fan’s existence, this move was.

The main proof of this lay upon two indisputable observations.  First was the sheer quantity of time the fan now spent working in the presence of the humans.   They spent much more time in the bedroom than they did in the living room.  Not only this, but they actually pulled the fan out of its corner so that it could be closer to them.   This led the fan to understand that it was part of the family.  The family consisted of the human him, the human her, the  canine him, and the feline him.   There were two other human hers, but they came and went with far less frequency now than they once had.

One day, after working with the humans in the bedroom, it overheard the humans speaking to each other.   This was not new, as they did this regularly. He had heard the human him say ” I love you’ to the human her.  The human her then repeated “I love you” back to the human him.   The fan watched as they looked into each other’s eyes and gradually fell asleep, holding hands.

The fan didn’t know quite what to make of this, and became curious about what had been witnessed.  It began to take a more keen interest in what the humans did in the bedroom.

It noticed that they used the bedroom more in the dark than in the light.  It watched them come and go in various stages of dress and undress.   It observed that on certain days the humans would stay in bed longer than others, and that on most days the human him would leave earlier than the human her.

On one of these days, he saw the human him and the canine him laying on the bed.  They were looking at each others eyes, and the human said “I love you” to the canine.  The canine opened its mouth very wide and said ” I love you ” back.  The human then kissed the canine on the head  and got up and left.  It was early in the day.

On the very same day, the other human  sat on the bed reading a book.  Beside her on the bed was the feline him.  The feline him was making a low soft noise, like a small engine.  The human her set her book down and picked up the feline him.  she brought the feline’s face close to her own and they looked into each other’s eyes.  The human her then said” I love you” to the feline him, who did not say it back, but continued to make the engine sound, only with increased vigour.

As the days and weeks went by, the fan observed this behaviour with an increased regularity.  It also noted that of the five animate creatures in the bedroom, it was the only one that had not had the experience of the “I love you” words.  The fan began to feel uneasy about this and this unease soon led to creeping doubts.  As time went by, the doubts became unease.

The unease became concern.

The concern grew into worry.

The worry grew into sadness.

The sadness grew into anger.

The anger grew into bitterness,

The bitterness grew into despair.

The fan longed to hear “I love you” and obsessed over it.  It felt alone and outcast, and each time it heard those words, it retreated a bit more into itself.  As time went by, the fan no longer enjoyed its work, as it no longer felt part of the family.

Nobody else seems to pay it any heed.

The human him would occasionally stand in front of the fan immediately after a shower. The human her sometimes would hold her hands up to it.  The canine him would sometimes sleep nearby.  The feline him completely ignored the fan, except when it would stop to occasionally shake its tail at the fan and spray it with urine.

The fan was slowly slipping into deeper and deeper levels of despair.  On a particularly bad day, when no one had even bothered to turn it on, the human him came into the room.  It placed a large glass of water on the edge of the chest of drawers beside it and went into the ensuite bathroom.

Left alone again, the fan willed itself to one final act.  It turned itself on and began spinning.  It spun awkwardly at first, and stopped once or twice .  It picked up speed and began to batter its blades against itself.  Faster it went, and faster still, until it began to vibrate its way along the floor.  it had never before felt the sensation of this type of motion.  it was strange and dangerous feeling.  this must be what falling feels like thought the fan as it spun and vibrated wildly.

It vibrated its way over to the chest of drawers, which began to hum with the sound of the buzzing fan.

Up above, the glass of water began to tremble with anticipation.  ” Is this what being drunk feels like?” it wondered.  As it thought this, the glass lost its balance and fell. The water spilled off the top of the chest of drawers and dripped onto the fan, who thought the drips were its own tears.    As the drips increased, the fan began to feel shaky and and a hot tingling began somewhere deep inside.  It was getting increasingly intense and as it did so, the fan grea afraid.  It wished it had never known the family.  It wished it had never left the living room.  It wished it had never eavesdropped.  It wished for this all to be over.  It wished for all these things, but more than anything, it wished to hear someone say ” I love you.”

It began to smoke.  It began to make whining sounds.

The smoke grew and the fan shook with a sickening convulsion.  It clunked loudly once, twice, then fell violently to the floor.

As the feeling of tingling left it, the fan saw fluffy balls of hair, a discarded sock, and an old shoebox beneath the bed.  As these faded, the fan thought it heard, from somewhere far away, the words ” ahhh, I loved that fan!”