the backs of our knees.

If our knees didn’t have backs, we could walk like grasshoppers.

If our knees didn’t have backs, hyperextension of the knees would be impossible.

If our knees didn’t have backs, our legs might be unstable and wobble to and fro.

What would become of our buttocks if our knees were backless?  would they disappear completely?  If they did, how would this affect sitting down?  Certainly it would be far less comfortable, not having a large muscle group to rest upon.  Would we have to remain the bum muscle group gluteus minimus?  Would we become more asymmetrical in profile?  and in the vernacular, would we still refer to our ass?  Or would we rename it?  What would we call it?  Bleg?  Lack?  Legack?

Or conversely, would the absence of the back of the knee lead to the development  of a second set of glutes?  The proximal gluteus maximus  and the distal gluteus maximus?  In profile we would look like some kind of weird asymmetrical vase – More like the profile of an ill-designed watering can.  The presence of the proximal glutes would also have an impact on sexual comments, such as ” nice pair of…   ….   ….  arses?   It doesn’t roll off the tongue easily.

Imagine someone walking toward you with a front -bum.  Try to picture it in your mind.  It is weird.

Want something weirder?

How about a woman who is eight months pregnant with no back of the knee with both the proximal and distal pairings?

This is getting strange.

Or a man with a front bum trying to urinate whilst standing?  Or sitting.

What about working out?    Sit-ups?   you could use situps like bicep curls, especially if we developed a kind of weight that could be attached to a shoe.  Or perhaps the really keen could hang from a bar and do fore and aft glute curls, swinging their legs in a pendulous fashion.

Speaking of fashion, it would likely have to adapt as well.   Skirts might become the most versatile item of clothing. How would the design of jeans adapt?  Where would the pockets go?  Would we end up with an extra set of  back pockets on the front?

Athletes in many sports could no jump equally well backward and forward. The offensive and defensive lines in football would devolve into a wobbly mass. Sprinters would find themselves stuck on spot, rapidly vibrating.  Cycling would evolve with the invention of a new gear that would allow for pushing on the pedals in a complete rotation on both sides.

As I write this, my feet are resting of the coffee table. The backs of my knees are keeping my legs from flexing downward.  If they weren’t there, I couldn’t type and slouch, as my laptop, in reality, is a legtop.